Ready for a deep dive into gratitude and its transformative power? Join us, Denise Russo and Sam Powell, as we kick off our series about cultivating happiness, with a special focus on the art of expressing gratitude. We share our own journeys, exploring how we've unlocked the joy of acknowledging and appreciating the present moment. Discover the little everyday actions that can spark a powerful change in perspective.
In our personal narratives, we open up about times of hardship, loss, and recovery, and how gratitude served as a beacon, guiding us back to happiness and peace. Listen as we unfold our stories of how we learned to maintain a positive outlook and a thankful heart, even when things seemed impossible. Gratitude, as we've discovered, paves the way for a renewed sense of wonder and appreciation for life, impacting not just us, but also those around us.
As we wrap up, we explore the various forms gratitude has taken in our lives. From sharing stories to inviting visitors into our spaces, we highlight the importance of keeping gratitude fresh and its powerful role in personal growth. We're grateful for each other and for the meaningful conversations we've shared while exploring books together. Join us, and together, let's uncover the incredible impact gratitude can have on your life. Next up, we'll be exploring the second activity for happiness, cultivating optimism, so stay tuned!
Connect with us on our LinkedIn page School of Thoughts . We also value your reviews, subscribing, and sharing our podcast "What's On Your Bookshelf?" on Apple and Spotify.
Ready for a deep dive into gratitude and its transformative power? Join us, Denise Russo and Sam Powell, as we kick off our series about cultivating happiness, with a special focus on the art of expressing gratitude. We share our own journeys, exploring how we've unlocked the joy of acknowledging and appreciating the present moment. Discover the little everyday actions that can spark a powerful change in perspective.
In our personal narratives, we open up about times of hardship, loss, and recovery, and how gratitude served as a beacon, guiding us back to happiness and peace. Listen as we unfold our stories of how we learned to maintain a positive outlook and a thankful heart, even when things seemed impossible. Gratitude, as we've discovered, paves the way for a renewed sense of wonder and appreciation for life, impacting not just us, but also those around us.
As we wrap up, we explore the various forms gratitude has taken in our lives. From sharing stories to inviting visitors into our spaces, we highlight the importance of keeping gratitude fresh and its powerful role in personal growth. We're grateful for each other and for the meaningful conversations we've shared while exploring books together. Join us, and together, let's uncover the incredible impact gratitude can have on your life. Next up, we'll be exploring the second activity for happiness, cultivating optimism, so stay tuned!
Connect with us on our LinkedIn page School of Thoughts . We also value your reviews, subscribing, and sharing our podcast "What's On Your Bookshelf?" on Apple and Spotify.
Welcome to what's On your Bookshelf, with your hosts Denise Rousseau and Samantha Powell.
Speaker 2:
Hi everyone, welcome back to another episode of what's On your Bookshelf. This is a life and leadership podcast where we are living out loud the pages of the books that are coming to life for us from our bookshelves. My name is Denise Rousseau. I'm here with my friend, sam Powell, who I'm so happy to be with. We are walking through the first book of our new series for 2024, which is a series all about happiness and seeking and pursuing happiness. The book that we're exploring right now is a book called the Howl of Happiness.
Speaker 2:
If you don't have this book, we really encourage you to get this book.
Speaker 2:
Where we are today, if you're jumping into this episode for the very first time, is we're now walking through the 12 activities that are for you to deep dive into, based on your scores of your self-assessment.
Speaker 2:
So, if this is the first episode you've heard of this and you don't have the book, or you're not really sure and you're a new friend of ours, I'd highly encourage you to back up just a little bit to the beginning of this book, because this is a book where we want to go in sequence, based on what you learned first in the first part of the book.
Speaker 2:
Now, that being said, if you have gone through the first section of the book and you took all three of the self-assessments and you know what your top four categories are, we will be doing these one by one so that you'll be able to go back and listen to the ones that are resonating with you the most for your top four. But remember, we said last week, this is based on your recipe. So in order to do that, we can't just give you our recipe for our top four or even the order of our top four. We're going to go through all 12. It just so happens that this one today, the first one, is my number one. So, sam, super happy to be here with you today, especially to go through this first principle that is the number one for me, yeah.
Speaker 1:
I'm super excited. So this is chapter four, but in chapter four they cover three of the happiness activities. So we're just going to focus on happiness activity one, which is expressing gratitude Again. So remember, contextually, these are things you can do in your life, in your actions, to make yourself more happy. And, like Denise said, this is her number one. This is actually my number six. I thought it was number five, but it's number six for me, which I was surprised about because I do really. This is something I do really like. I guess I just like some other stuff. I enjoy other things a little bit more, but, yeah, this is, this is great. So, denise, when you think about expressing gratitude, what does that look like for you? Like, without reading the chapter and without like you know because we'll get into what that means here and some things we could do but like when you think about it, because this is your number one, what is that?
Speaker 2:
It makes me really think about veggie tails. So I don't know if you've ever seen these, these cartoon. I love veggie tails. So they're from a company called Big Idea, which I think Big Idea is now owned by Universal Studios, which would be so amazing. If you've never seen the veggie tail shows, I encourage you to go out on YouTube and watch them.
Speaker 2:
But there was one that I recall very vividly, where there was a song or a story around that a grateful heart is a happy heart, and so when I think about this chapter about practicing gratitude and that the book is the how of happiness and this is the happiness number one activity, for me, it really resonated that a grateful heart is a happy heart and that this is about abundance, and this chapter does talk about how savoring this abundance and this. When you even think about what does abundance bring to mind for you? For me, we talked about this last week that we're recording these episodes during a time of the year which is at the end of last year we're just with you now in February but we recorded this episode right before Thanksgiving. And so when I think about abundance and I think about savoring and I think about gratitude, I think about Thanksgiving, and so I'm really looking forward to walk through what some of the activities are that you can do for this particular category.
Speaker 2:
One of the things that I do is I have something called a November to remember. So every day in November, I put a post out on my social media about something I'm grateful for, and it's not just to share that gratitude so that other people can see what I'm grateful for. It's about holding myself accountable to acknowledging things that might even be small, that I'm grateful for. So I think that's what resonates with me for this one, Sam is that it doesn't have to be that you're grateful for something so momentous. It's finding gratitude and even little things in your life, but making them consciously aware in your mind and in your heart that there are things that we all have to be thankful for, whether it's just breathing, waking up each day and having another opportunity to have a chance to live a life that is of meaning and purpose. So for me, that that's the beginning of my thoughts here.
Speaker 1:
I can totally see that and, knowing you and spending lots of good quality time with you, it just like this just pours out of you naturally. So I can totally see how this is your number one because it just is so much a part of who you are. Like, when we did our retreat last fall, you had us do so many different activities that were really this at the end of the day, right, like we did some real mindful activities. We did like a mindful lunch, we did a very purposeful walk through the park. That we did.
Speaker 1:
And your setup every time was in this spirit of gratitude and in this like notice today, notice, even if you've been here before, which no one in the group had been into this park before besides you and your husband, but it was like today we'll never be here again.
Speaker 1:
Right, and just living in this life of appreciation, in this space of gratitude and you, you just that's just who you are, so naturally that like I totally see it and you help me think all the time and slow down a little bit to just be grateful for like today. Today I feel good, like, right, there's no aches and pains in my body. Some days there are right, but today there's none, and I feel grateful about that. You and I sit down all the time, but never again will we have this conversation and even if we sit down and we record another episode or whatever, it just it won't be this. And so to be grateful for this moment and this attitude, like that's something I learned from you every time we talk together and it just it pours out of you in everything that you do and you talk about, and if it really reads your posts online like, yeah, so I'm resonating with what you're saying here, because I live it every time. I experience you and it's I'm grateful for that.
Speaker 2:
Thank you. You know, I think that's what's interesting about this chapter is that you can be grateful in all circumstances if you have your mind and your heart right. And this is about positive thinking too, and it isn't about sugar coated, happy, cheerleader-y kind of positive thinking. This is about finding positive amidst negative, and you and I both have gone through traumatic experiences personally and professionally, and being able to still find things to be grateful for in and through those experiences is so important, and, in fact, this podcast wouldn't have existed if it wasn't for something that was a experience that we didn't ask for in our life. With some of our changes in our job, in fact, isn't it funny to think, sam, when this episode comes out, we will have been gone from our day jobs, where we became friends, for a year. Isn't that crazy? It's crazy.
Speaker 1:
It's funny how fast time goes by. And yeah, I don't know, it's super interesting, super, super interesting. Yeah, and you're right, right, like regardless of circumstance, and that's really what this is about. Right, circumstance is 10%. We're in the 40% of what you can control. It's how you live, it's how you act and it's that attitude of gratitude.
Speaker 1:
I always love that saying because I love rhyming, but that sitting in that space and regardless of where you are, you can be in, you can sit in gratitude. I mean that when my son passed away and we were flooded with support and people showing up and people bringing us meals and doing all of these wonderful things for us, I felt such gratitude. And so the thank you card that I made was a picture of our son and it just said grateful on the front, because that was the only word I could describe. And when it came back to work and I realized that people didn't know what to do with me, like, didn't know how to talk to me, didn't know how to approach me, didn't know how to be with me in the space that I was, I sent in emails to everybody that just said thank you, I'm so grateful for you. We can talk about anything you want, you know, like you know giving that space for that.
Speaker 1:
But it was in the spirit of gratitude. I was so grateful in the dark, absolute darkest moment of my life because of the actions of other people, right, and there was so much, even in deep loss, to be grateful for, and it's being in a place where you can recognize that that gave me happiness in a moment where there was no happiness. Right, like you know, you think about you lose your, you lose your child or 16 month old baby, and yet can still experience happiness. And it was because of graduate, like right, I was able to be grateful, I was able to express that and to say that and it's just, you're absolutely right, right, it's just.
Speaker 1:
Regardless of circumstances, there is something. If you come to it in the right spirit, if you get your mind and your heart right, you can sit in that space. And you can't. You know you can't do that. And I loved the definition that she has for what is gratitude here, and it comes from another researcher and writer, robert Emmons, and he defines gratitude as a felt sense of wonder, thankfulness and appreciation for life. And so when we think about gratitude, I love the felt sense of wonder, because that's it, it's like that awe, like that awe-inspiring, like I just I can't believe how, like, wow, like just, oh, I just love, I love that definition.
Speaker 2:
I love that too and it makes me think about there was a time where it was in 2009,. We lost our home to a massive flood. 1800 homes were destroyed in this massive flood, and I'm talking like 20 feet of water over our house is massive, not just water on your carpet. We lost everything, and I remember this day. It took weeks to be able to. We had to take everything down to even just the electrical wiring in our house, down to the studs of the house, and so lots of people were coming in and out and helping us over time, and there was this one particular day.
Speaker 2:
I saw this older couple walking up the street and they didn't look like the typical people that were there to help people tear out their drywall and throw away everything they owned into giant dumpsters. It was just something peculiar about these two people and they seemed very peaceful and they seemed very calm, and I recall them coming up to my what was left of the steps of the front of my house and I was sitting there and they came up and they asked me some different questions and how was I doing? And I was super positive despite this very bad circumstance, but I think it's because my perspective was different. I remember having a couple neighbors that were very devastated, depressed. They couldn't even get their emotions together to just clear out their houses. But I think I've always been a person that is a logical thinker, and so I just knew okay, the house is destroyed, we need to throw things away, and that's all I was focusing on. I didn't really have any emotion behind it, but I recall specifically this lady named Ginger and her husband Denny, and they said to me if there's one thing that you wish wouldn't have been destroyed, what would it have been? And it caused me to pause because we had thrown away six full dumpsters full of my personal belongings. And so, as I sat there and I started thinking, I said you know, the only thing that I wish that hadn't been destroyed is my Bible. It was in my car, and you know you often hear these stories about like, oh, the entire house burnt down and there was the Bible, right? So my Bible was in the car and my car was completely submerged, and so when the water receded, I was able to get it out. I actually still have it. Maybe I can take a picture and I'll give it to Scott to share, but it was no longer usable, like it was completely waterlogged and destroyed from sewage because the flood was a flood from the ground up.
Speaker 2:
So, anyways, long story of the short is. Well, it's not probably short, I guess, but the story goes that it so happened that Denny and Ginger were not there to rip out drywall. They were there as a part of the Billy Graham disaster team, and so their job was to go around and try to instill a sense of peace and calm for people. And yet they said to me you are probably the most peaceful, positive thinking person and you're sitting here expressing gratitude amidst destruction. So we had this great time of me just sharing a little bit about my faith and them sharing a little bit about why they were there and such and such.
Speaker 2:
So, anyways, the next day these people came back around, specifically to my house, and I was so grateful to see them, not because I needed anything from them, but because we had this really great conversation the day before and Sam Ginger handed me her own Bible and she said I just feel strong in my heart that I need to get this to you, and it so happened. It was her training Bible from the Billy Graham disaster team group of, from Samaritan's Purse and these teams. It is one of the most cherished things I took away from losing everything, because she listened, and she listened to this thing that I felt like I had lost. She wasn't able to replace it with an exact replica of what I lost, but she gave me something more important, which was from her heart, and so when I and it cost her nothing but her time in her heart to do something, and I'm so grateful for that. So when I was reading this book, these are things that came to my mind, but I think it's important to to talk about.
Speaker 2:
These aren't just about feelings.
Speaker 2:
There's a lot of science behind what happens in our brain when we are grateful, and so one thing I want to point out that happened in the book is it talks about how expressing gratitude it's a lot more than just saying thank you.
Speaker 2:
So when you think about the scenario of what happened with you, with your coworkers, and what happened with me, with these folks from the Billy Graham disaster team, there's this research that's talked about in the book that's drawing attention to the benefits of being somebody who is a grateful person. It says that people who are consistently grateful have been found to be relatively happier, more energetic, more hopeful and to report experiencing more frequent positive emotions. They also tend to be more helpful, empathetic, spiritual and religious, more forgiving, less materialistic than others who are less predisposed to gratefulness and, furthermore, the person is more inclined to gratitude, is less likely to be more depressed, anxious, lonely, envious or neurotic. All of those research findings are correlational, and so it's about gratitude. And so there's another part of this chapter that's about positive thinking, but in this first section she goes on, the author goes on to describing some actual studies and participants that she put through studies to look at the effects in your mind and in your health when you have an attitude of gratitude.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, yeah, I thought that was really incredible, right, and I think that's all of the positive benefits that just expressing gratitude for things, right, that reflection process of thinking about what am I grateful for and then expressing it in some way. Then he had had this slew of positive emotions and decreased the negative emotions, like from multiple different studies. Like, I thought that was fascinating and I found it to be true anecdotally, in my own life as well. Right, like when I sit in a place of gratitude, yeah, like it does help curb some of those you know, feelings. Right, like in my story of, like, coming back to work, and that was the first thing I did was express gratitude to, you know, my coworkers and, you know, this family that I have from work. Like that helped me walk back in, right, there was less anxiety, less, you know, less of that, because it was me, I don't know, being thankful and letting people know that and that made me feel good and it was a great way to come back in to, you know quote unquote normalcy of life. And yeah, like I've seen it and I see it all the time now when I send somebody a text, it's like you know, I just want you to know, like, like you know, thinking of you love this right I had.
Speaker 1:
I told you off camera, I think, or I think I may have said in the last episode, it took me forever to read this section. Forever because I kept thinking about things. I was thinking about a study, I would think about something and I was like, oh my gosh, this person, that person like and like I'm sending text messages to people and it's like thought of you gonna study this message. Let you know like, really, really appreciate it, like it was great, maybe feel wonderful, like I just I was happier, like as I did it. It took me a long time to read the section.
Speaker 2:
So, if you're reading this book like budget some time, my friends, this is about intentional living, which, by the way, is another one of my favorite books from John Maxwell If it's hard to pick a favorite because he has over a hundred. You and I have both studied with him, we're both certified by him. But this book, Intentional Living, which is one of my favorite books. There's activities in that book that directly correlate to this chapter, One of which is that an intentional living. It gives you ideas, Just like in this book. There's ideas, and I know we're almost out of time for today, so we're not gonna be able to go through all the ideas. That's why you need to get a copy of this book. But in the Intentional Living book there was a section where you would come up with an activity of gratitude or expressing gratitude, and so the idea was to write.
Speaker 2:
For me was to write a love letter to my kids. They're my most favorite human beings in the entire spinning globe, and so I wrote each of them a letter, a short letter. They were young at the time when I bought the book. They were probably in elementary, middle school age and so they came home from school and I said hey, I have something that I wanna do with you guys, but you have to sit on the couch and we're gonna do something. And they thought, well, are we in trouble? And so, knowing who I am, I don't think for even more than a hot second. They thought they were in trouble. They probably just thought that it was gonna be something corny or something that would hopefully be fun. And so we sat down, I handed them these love letters and I asked them to read them out loud and, Sam, it's a core memory of mine of that day because I can still see their faces of how happy they were by reading words that were my words of my gratitude and love for them.
Speaker 2:
And it all happened because in this book, Intentional Living, it said to do what you did, even with your friends, with the text messaging do something. You can say something and do nothing. The results you have in your life are about doing, Not just thinking. It starts with your thoughts, but your thoughts have to turn into an action of some sort for you to have the outcomes that you want. So the book does talk about eight ways that gratitude can boost your happiness. There's really great ways there. It also talks about ways you can practice gratitude, One of the ways. I know that we'll talk about this actually in a much future episode. It's about journaling, and so one of our books that we'll walk through you found through journaling, which I think was either the art of happiness or it's the happiness project journey.
Speaker 1:
Yeah.
Speaker 2:
So we'll be talking about that. There's different things you can do to keep your strategies fresh how to express gratitude directly to other people and to one another with a sort of like this one I did with my kids. And then, furthermore, there is all kinds of extra activities and guides that the author provides in the book that are in the appendix. So it's like you said you could read this one chapter, I think. Well gosh, how are we gonna create an entire episode on five pages? There's so much more to it, and it's about living these things out loud. So, as you think about that, Sam, and what we were talking about today, I know we didn't get to dive into having a positive mindset and positive thinking, but what are some things for you that stand out in this number one principle or activity of expressing gratitude?
Speaker 1:
Yeah, I think that's like how to express gratitude, right. So this goes through why gratitude is so great. And then you know these eight different ways that it does it and I love some of those. I think my favorite I don't even know if that I could really pick a favorite one, but it really, you know, like it encourages, like social bonds, and it, you know, helps to like inhibit some of the things that you don't wanna do, right, like comparison to others, like all this sort of stuff. But the ways that she gives to do this and she writes, she gives for like big topics, but it's the gratitude journal which is great and like you see that everywhere, like write it down and things like that. But and then she talks about like other paths, ways to gratitude and sometimes it's just letting, inviting people into your experiences. One of the things I highlighted that I hadn't thought about as an expression of gratitude was introduce a visitor to the things people in places you love, like somebody new. And then I thought about that like not even physically, like oh, I visited my town, I would show them things I love, but just a visitor to my life, right, and telling people things I love, and it reminded me of.
Speaker 1:
I was at a women's networking event this week and we were talking. We were in a clothing store, so it was at one of our local businesses. That's a nonprofit that sells re like women's clothing, right, like you can donate your clothes and then they resell it. But they do a lot of like helpful for women who have nothing right, the only thing they have is the clothes on their back, and so they'll help. You know, and that's been on profit side of it, but you can go in and shop in their store and they have great stuff. But we were talking about reusing clothes and we got on the topic, of course, that like all women do, about like the bridesmaid dresses that you never like, because the bride always tells you oh, I bought this so you could wear it again and like you never, ever, ever can wear it again.
Speaker 1:
One of my very good friends, who I just love dearly she was one of the bridesmaids in my wedding. My son was born, my oldest son was born at my wedding, at my bride, at my shower, baby shower, she gave me a quilt and this quilt was beautiful. It had like little cute, like these little cute squares of like animals and stuff and you know, like it was yellow and green and beautiful. And I was like, oh, this is beautiful, this is lovely. And she said the green squares on the quilt are the dress that I wore in your wedding. I took my bridesmaid dress. We chopped it up. She's like the trim around the outside is the lining of the dress. They use all the pieces they could have the dress and it was a short dress. We got married in the summer. They took this whole thing and she made it into this beautiful baby quilt and it was this like beautiful, like it's one of my favorite gifts.
Speaker 1:
I think about it all the time. I've used it with both of my kids, like it's hanging in a room right now. It's lovely. But I thought about this inviting someone into your space, into your life, right Into the things that you love, as a way of showing gratitude. And so I told two women this story as we were talking about and joking about the dresses, and they were both like the one that he was like oh my gosh, I got chills, right, and it was an expression of gratitude, right. I am forever so grateful for this gift. It just it touches my heart and every time I tell that story. People are like, oh my gosh, I've got to go look at the dresses I've got in my closet and things like this. But this, like it was just inviting visitors in my life into the things that I love as an expression of gratitude, and like it was total reframing for me.
Speaker 1:
So as I read this section, as I was having this experience, I was like that was what I thought of and I just love that right, that expressing gratitude doesn't have to be the writing in the journal that's not for everybody. Or expressing gratitude doesn't have to be sending the text message, cause maybe that's not for everybody. But expressing gratitude can be telling the story of the thing that you're so very grateful for to the visitors in your life. And I just I loved that reframing of that process. So it's like, as we close this chapter out, we thought about what are the things I loved?
Speaker 1:
You know, I really liked that and I liked how she framed up. You know, keeping it fresh, and that real gratitude comes from when you're just a little bit outside of you know, like you're doing things that are new and fresh and whatever. Right, if I told that story every day to every person, it would lose its effect. But you know, kind of doing those things and taking that space, I just I thought she framed it up so lovely, so that was what I loved. So and here, what about you?
Speaker 2:
What did you like? One that's beautiful, and I can't wait to see the quilt. Yeah, I'll send you a picture. One I would say, too, is that what I took away from the chapter is something that we're getting to live out loud together, which is that I am so grateful that not only do you invest your time with me every week for multiple hours besides just what people get to hear on these episodes but that the things that we're growing through life together on are meaningful, like the books that we have already done this book that we're in and the ones that are to come to be able to be yoked to a friend going through things that are going to make you healthier mentally, spiritually and physically. It's just so. I don't have a right adjective for it other than to say that today, sam, wow, I'm ever grateful for you and you believing in the possibilities of what we're building here together, and so thank you.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, well, that's so lovely. I appreciate that and I'm always like every time we do this, I'm so grateful for you inviting me into this space and saying like hey, you know cause I started with that wooden book that we did like, hey, I've got this sports book that you might really like. I think we should do this. And you invited me I mean right, cause that led us to Atomic Habits, that led us to this book. And like it's funny how just the little invitations into your space can create an opportunity for gratitude and I'm forever grateful for this experience because I've loved it. It has created a conversation with people in my life. My grandmother and I just talked about it this week, actually. She called me and we were talking about some stuff and she was like I love it, I'm listening to you cause Atomic Habits is airing right now, and she was like I love it.
Speaker 1:
She's like I love listening to you, denise. I can't wait to meet her one day. It's like, all right, we'll make it happen, grandma.
Speaker 2:
I definitely want to meet her too. I'm so grateful for everybody that's listening in and, hey, if this is helping you, please share it with other people, like that's what we're talking about today. If this is helping you, share it with other people. It helps us too, because the more people that listen, then people get exposed to the information. And it isn't about the Sam and Denise show, it isn't even about Scott and Scott, we're grateful for you too. You're behind the curtain here doing all the editing and it's so vital that you're a part of this. But we're doing this because it's helping ourselves in. A byproduct of that, hopefully, is that it's helping you as well. So please share, subscribe, comment. Scott will have lots of information for ways you can get in touch with us. This has been an awesome time together. Next week, we're going to be going into the second one of the 12. It's on cultivating optimism, and so I'm looking forward to that one. That one was not in my top four. Was it in your?
Speaker 1:
top four, Sam. The next one was my number one, actually. So yeah, so right off the gate, right out of the gate here episode one, episode two of these activities are your number one and my number one, and I think anybody who knows me like I'm an eternal optimist, so this was probably not super surprising.
Speaker 2:
That's awesome. Well, I can't wait to then learn more about that one with you next week, but for now, friends, my name's Denise Russo. Thank you, my friend, sam Powell. Together, we've been with you today for another episode of what's On your Bookshelf.