What's on Your Bookshelf?
“What’s On Your Bookshelf” is a personal and professional growth podcast exploring the intersections of passion, potential, and purpose - featuring multi-certified coach and leadership development consultant Denise R. Russo alongside Sam Powell, Zach Elliott, Tom Schweizer, Dennis LaRue, and Michelle King.
What's on Your Bookshelf?
95 - Intentional Living - With People Who Make a Difference
Ever wondered how connecting with diverse minds can transform your life? Join us, Denise Russo and Samantha Powell, as we explore John Maxwell's "Intentional Living" and uncover the magic of building relationships with like-minded individuals while embracing diverse perspectives. We'll share personal stories that highlight how engaging with people who challenge our viewpoints can spur significant growth and enrich our lives. Discover the value of a cohesive team when striving for monumental goals, and how collective trust and collaboration can make our dreams more achievable and meaningful.
Next, we dive into the challenges and rewards of forming a new team within a large organization, drawing inspiration from the Japanese philosophy of Kaizen. With a clear vision and a steadfast belief in the mission, we discuss the pivotal strategies that drive continuous improvement and significant change. Learn how faith over fear can unlock resources and propel you towards your goals. We'll share our insights on brainstorming, seizing opportunities, and navigating the sacrifices necessary for the right path, all while fostering a culture committed to excellence.
Lastly, we shine a spotlight on the transformative power of attitude in achieving success. Drawing from Martin Luther King's insights on leadership, we explore whether our attitudes serve as assets or liabilities in our pursuits. Through compelling personal anecdotes, we demonstrate how a positive outlook and openness to new challenges can lead to extraordinary growth. We'll also discuss the importance of setting ambitious dreams to attract talent and how collaboration among winners can result in remarkable achievements. Wrapping up, we emphasize the joy and fulfillment that comes from partnering with the right people at the right time, setting the stage for our upcoming episode on living with anticipation and urgency. Don't forget to subscribe and share your journey with us!
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Welcome to what's on your Bookshelf, with your hosts Denise Russo and Samantha Powell.
Speaker 2:Hi everyone, welcome back. It's another episode of what's on your Bookshelf. This is a life and leadership podcast where we are living out loud the pages of the books on our bookshelves. My name is Denise Russo, I'm here with my co-host and friend, sam Powell, and we are exploring the book called Intentional Living by John Maxwell. I'm really looking forward to this episode today because it's all about living life with intention, with people who make a difference and, sam, you're definitely that person to me.
Speaker 1:Oh, you are definitely one of those people. For me too, yeah, I uh, I like this. I like this chapter, right. So we've talked about I want to make a difference, doing something that makes a difference, and now this is with people who make a difference and the two. He has two chapters here. The first one is connect with like-minded people and partner with like valued people. So when you think about the first part of this, right, connecting with like minded people, I always say that you're, you're a great connector of people like. You find people, you find ideas and you really like this is one of, I think, your, your natural gifts. So, when you think about connecting with like-minded people, like I don't know, what are some of the things that go through your mind, what are some of the things that you look for when you're thinking about, I don't know, making those connections or connecting with those people yourselves?
Speaker 2:It was really interesting to think about that, because I don't think that I seek out just like-minded people. I think actually, I seek out people who are different-minded people, and that's what makes life curious and interesting. I have a lot of friends from a lot of different backgrounds and cultures and thought processes and especially, you know, here we are at the end of the year. We've just gone through, I think, a very not like-minded period in our own country of volatility with elections and whether that be local, state or national, and it seems to me that what's missing continuously is connection with not just like-minded people, but communication and connection with people who are not like-minded. And so that struck me a little bit in this chapter, because when I think about some of the people that have become maybe the most valuable to me, they aren't just people that think like me. They may have some things that we have in common, but I think what makes our relationship so special are the things that make us different.
Speaker 2:And it gets me thinking about a friend of mine who recently passed away and and he was sick for a while, but I recall that some of the most interesting conversations that I had with him while he was alive and vibrant and healthy were the things we didn't agree on and we didn't let that stop us from being very close friends and in fact I valued him so greatly because I loved hearing the way he thought about things that were different than the way I thought about things, because it challenged my thinking and there were certain times where, even though I still believed what I believed about whatever the topic was, it got me to think through the lens of someone else. In fact, in the last chapter last week, there was a section in there that talked about understanding people where they are or the things that are important to them. Now, I don't condone necessarily saying connecting with people that are different minded if the way that those differences are hurt other people.
Speaker 1:So I want to be clear that, being connected with people, it's important that whoever you're connected to, if they are different thinkers than you, that either side of the thinking isn't to the demise or destruction of somebody else yeah, I think that's fair, that's fair, and he said, and john says in this chapter like towards the beginning is true, significance or destruction of somebody else yeah, I think that's fair, that's fair, and he said, and John says in this chapter like towards the beginning is true, significance will always be bigger than the person with the dream.
Speaker 1:That's why it requires a team of people working together to achieve it. So, I think, in like this context, cause, I completely agree with you right, like, we benefit so much from different perspectives, from different ways of thinking, different walks of life, different life experiences, but if we're trying to move towards something significant, it requires a team of people who are trying to achieve it right, and you need people who are like-minded. And I think that end goal right, and and it's really about, like, attracting people to the cause right, the what are we doing? And the why are we doing it? And thinking and finding the right people who are really connected to that significant cause, that significant thing that you're trying to do. So, finding people who are like you in that space of we have the same like future thought process, maybe, but balancing that with, like the you know the different things that you know the people people have. I think this is more about, like probably finding the people who want to go on the ride with you, more than anything.
Speaker 2:I think I could share a real example there, based on how you just ended, that you have to have people that want to go on the ride. That's the like-mindedness. You have to have people around you that trust you, that believe in you, that are aligned with you, that value you, which is everything that we talked about last week, which is valuing other people. Well, the reverse happens, that if they value you, they'll want to. Like I said, john says people won't go along with you if they don't get along with you. And I can recall this.
Speaker 2:One time I had just put together a new team at a place I was working and it was brand new. The team had never existed before. The things we were striving for never existed before. We were a small team in a really big ocean where it was going to take a really significant uphill climb to convince the leaders that changing the strategy and the focus and the direction would actually make a difference for the business. And I can recall one time having a meeting with a team of people and asking them two things If you were me, what would you do? Like, if your feet were in my shoes, what would you do? And then the second thing I remember asking them is what is one idea that you think we haven't considered yet that we should try? And we got a lot of brainstorming out of that session. We didn't get to do everything that everybody thought was a good idea, but those ideas brought about even other ideas. That's a whole process of this idea of Kaizen.
Speaker 2:So I used to work years and years ago for another company, and the founder of that company used to hold tight to this Japanese word and concept called Kaizen, which means continuous improvement. It's actually came from manufacturing, which was about that, no matter what you're doing, there's always going to be a way to make it better, not to say that you shouldn't celebrate and be okay with where you are today, but you should never stop there, always be looking for continuous improvement, and so for me, this idea of having a dream and connecting with people that have like mindedness goes to what you just said. You have to know where you're going, sort of what the end should look like. You may not know the route to get there, but you know what the end should look like, yeah.
Speaker 1:Right, it's like I want to help people with in this way, or these types of people with a certain thing, right, and you want people who are bought into that kind of a, that kind of a concept. And he talks about factors. He's got, I think, nine factors that connect people of significance. So finding the right people, getting them in the right space. So one he talks about the opportunity factor. So significance almost always occurs in response to opportunities, right. So if you're looking for something, it's what's the opportunity in front of you? How can you help people in this space right now? And I love he said sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step in your life. Tiptoe if you must, but take that first important step right. If the opportunity is there, step into it. And you want people who also are willing to step into it with you.
Speaker 2:I highlighted right after that, which is maybe something our listeners can get value from, which is a question that he posed to you as a reader and we're posing it to you as the listener, which is what opportunity do you see right now to make a difference, like, take the time, even write that question down or ponder it later, or just put a bookmark at this time on the podcast? What opportunity do you see right now to make a difference with other people that want to make a difference?
Speaker 1:Yep, exactly. And then the belief factor is. The next thing is do you believe that you're going to, you know, find the right people? Do you believe that you know you, that people will come help you to make a difference? That's the question at the end of this one is do you believe people are coming to help you?
Speaker 2:And if they are, if they are willing to come help you. The next one is what are you willing to give up to make that difference? Because sometimes to do something different, you have to give up something you've been doing to get something you should be doing.
Speaker 1:And I like that. He called it the possibility factor, because we all sit in. So many possibilities right, there's a thousand, there's an infinite number of avenues that we can take in our life, but you've got to limit that down, you've got to find that path and, yeah, in order to move forward, you've got to give up other options. Right, it's like if you decide you want to be a parent, you're giving up not being a parent, or vice versa, or you know something like that. We make these decisions and so I like that. He called that the possibility factor. Right, like you, gotta, gotta let go of some all you know, all of the possibilities, and find the ones that are really serving the direction you're going towards.
Speaker 2:I like that. He took the possibility factor, which is around beliefs, and stretched the concept of belief a little bit further, which was about faith. Now, we know Dr Maxwell is a man of faith. A lot of his books talk about his faith in God. But this part talks about your faith in the thing that you're doing and if your faith in it and in the people and in the process and in the possibilities is greater than your fear of not doing it. So, like the example you gave about do you want to become a parent, it can be really scary to think about changing your life from going from being not a parent to being a parent. It could be a really scary thing to say is my faith that I could really do this thing I'm great at in my own business instead of working for somebody else, or in a different business instead of where I am now or in a higher level in the business that I'm at currently? Is your faith greater than your fear? Because you won't take action if your fear outweighs your faith in it?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I liked he said that fear is the key that locks the door to resources. Faith is the key that opens the door, and I do like that idea of like. Do I believe that I, that we can do this, that I can do this, that this is something that is possible? And you have to work through those fears constantly? Right, that's something we do in coaching all the time is, what's the fear? You've got right? What is this thing that's holding you back? What is restricting you from taking that step, trying that thing, moving in the direction that you want to do? Right, how can you make that fear bigger or make that faith bigger than that fear?
Speaker 2:Yeah. The next one is about the challenge that's in front of you. And are you? And so John says, are you challenged to stretch yourself? And so I was telling somebody just this morning about the concept of a rubber band. Where you think about the purpose of a rubber band, where you think about the purpose of a rubber band is to be stretched, to hold something right, like that's why rubber bands were invented, I suppose, or used or created or thought of. But when you take the rubber band off the thing that it's banding, it naturally goes back to its original shrinkage and the state that it was before it was stretched. So I think, with intentional living and looking through these factors, it's easy to stay in your natural state. Are you willing to be stretched, knowing that the purpose, like the band, is for you to be stretched, not to necessarily go back to that original state?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think that it's an important thing as you're going through this journey of like, if you're trying to connect with people, if you're trying to build towards something together, there's going to be discomfort, it's just. It's like you don't get to where you want to go without getting outside your comfort zone. Right, inside your comfort zone is all the things you already have. Outside your comfort zone are all the things that you want, right? And this is about striving for something. This is about stretching.
Speaker 1:I love the rubber band analogy. It's one of my favorites. And then he goes on to talk about attitude. Right, martin Luther King. He has a quote here that says the biggest job in getting any movement off the ground is to keep together the people who form it. And he thinks and John says that he believes a big part of his success in doing that comes from his attitude. Right, there's like we can do this, we, you know we can do that. And I love the question he has here and I feel like I want to take this into my small, my sports analogy world here of like.
Speaker 1:Is your attitude an asset or a liability? Right? Is the attitude that you're living with, that you're bringing to the table. Is it helping you or is it hindering you, right? Is it moving you forward or is it keeping you stuck or, worse, moving you backwards, right? And that's such a great question I think to is like a check in all the time, like, oh my gosh, right now, what's going on in my life? It's like, is my attitude about stuff hindering or helping me? Is it an asset or is it a liability? And I think I might write that one down as a personal sticky note every day of what's my attitude and is it an asset or a liability.
Speaker 2:Is it an asset or a liability? I can think of this. One time I had taken over a very large team that had been together but had been through a significant reorg before I became the leader of the team and there was this one person in a different country, sort of like the story I told earlier about a different person from a different country, sort of like the story I told earlier about a different person from a different country. And this person was on the younger side of her tenure and she was kind of like stuck in this crossfire of transformation and reorg without a leader. She was somebody who in the former setup of the organization would have been like two or three levels below where I was in my role, so not somebody who would have naturally directly reported to me. But because of the reorg the person reported to me and she was sort of like in this situation where she could have easily been forgotten and lost in the system. And I remember having a conversation with her where she proactively reached out to me to say hey, I don't even have English as my natural first language. I live in another country, I don't know you, I'm on your team and I'm on your org chart and apparently you're my new manager, even though you probably aren't supposed to be, and I think that my job is going away. She could have easily become defeated. She could have been fearful, she could have had an attitude of liability like that.
Speaker 2:Other person started the conversation with me, but what transpired with this person was she started talking about the possibilities and the things that she liked that she'd never tried before. In fact, this person had never done the role that I was transforming the team into becoming, which was instructional designers, never had done the job before, but she was up for the challenge and excited about it. So it turns out, sam, that when, because of her attitude, when we started transitioning the team, not only did I decide I wanted to keep her reporting directly to me, but we got her this training that she needed to do, this new world that she had never done before. She became a fantastic superstar at this work and her work was being recognized and celebrated, and I recall that it was not even really probably a year, not even maybe a year later.
Speaker 2:She had done so well that she came to me one day and she said I hope that you won't be upset with me, but I've decided to try for a job in another team where I could do the same thing that you taught me how to do. But it would be like a promotion and I was like upset with you. I'm, I'm thrilled for you. Like, isn't that the greatest thing as a leader, when you could see somebody grow into their potential and their passion areas and then thrive beyond that. And so she ended up leaving our team, went to this other team and did superbly, fantastically well, and every time I checked in with her since then she had been super happy and it never would have transpired had her attitude not been an asset and her faith be bigger than her fear.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that. I that's such a great story and I think connects to the next part of you know that he called it the winning factor. But you know, big dreams draw big people right. When you set a big vision, when you set something like, hey, we're gonna do this and somebody's got the right attitude and they, you know, then they're attracted to that right. It's like, and the question he's got here is are you connecting with winners to achieve significance? Are you attracting to do the work and to to have the faith and to take that leap and to take that challenge and then go build it and bring it, you know, somewhere else to and make it even bigger?
Speaker 2:you know bigger than themselves.
Speaker 2:This has me thinking about, for some reason, like the men's USA Olympic basketball team, these that those teammates were all winners of significance on their home NBA teams, but they came together for a common cause to be a part of the Olympics.
Speaker 2:And I recall hearing an interview where one of the people who was not the captain of the Olympic team but now just a player who was a captain or is a captain of his team at home in his NBA team, was asked a question around like well, how can you follow the leadership of this other guy who you compete against? And he said, because he's like the greatest of all times, like why would I not want to be on his team? This is an opportunity that I don't get to do at home, where I'm in competition with this person. Now I get to collaborate with the person. So what might be opportunities for you to seek out winners and, instead of compete, to collaborate, like in business, especially if you work for one company, there shouldn't be a competition across board areas or across teams or across functions. Where can you find the best winners and bring the winners together to make that kind of gold standard team?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that. That's a great analogy. And you're right, right, bringing people together in this space, that if you've got something like we're going for gold here, right, we're going for Olympic gold, like that's something different and significant and we want that, and so, yeah, of course we're going to bring the best right. Of course the people who are those types of people are going to be attracted to that. And so I think if you've got the right big dreams, if you've got dreams big enough, other people come along for the ride, sort of naturally. And then he talks about the.
Speaker 1:John talks about the promise factor, which I love that he said like originally he truly believed a worthy dream contained a promise of fulfillment, but it was a naive mistake. And he says a dream requires a partner, which is commitment, right. So when we think about the promise, a promise factor, it's a promise to fulfill and commit to the fulfillment, right. So when we think about the promise, a promise factor, it's a promise to fulfill and commit to the fulfillment right. And when I think of commitment, I think of from the book I'm just totally blanking on the bit it's the I forget the number 15 commitments of leaders, but they talk about commitment as in action, what are you going to actually take action on? And so, when I think about the promise factor of you know something significant of bringing other people along it's that we're going to do this right. We're committed to fulfilling the stream, but we're going to do that through action and through making things. Making things happen.
Speaker 2:And if you've committed to it, you have to invite people to it, and so that actually leads itself into the whole section that comes after. I know we're almost out of time, so we'll get to the next section now, but the invitation is about partnering, and partnering with like valued people, which was the next step in John's journey as he was looking for intentional living of partnering with like valued people, which was the next step in John's journey as he was looking for intentional living of partnering with like valued people. He says that life isn't made by what you accomplish. It's made by what you can accomplish with others, and you've talked about this a lot, about how, in order to get anything done and to get anything done, well, it's about your relationships with others.
Speaker 1:Exactly and I like that. He talks about like valued people and he says if a partnership is to last over the long haul, there must be shared values. When people's values are different, there will inevitably be a parting of ways, and so, right, we're talking about we've just talked about finding like-minded people with all of these different factors, right, People who are thinking in the same way about this goal that you've got. But you've got to take it the step farther of really finding the people whose values are the same to you, Because if you've got conflicting values, inevitably there will be a point where you've got to diverge. But if you're really committed to that long-term, you know vision and you bring in people who have those same, you know core beliefs, thoughts, values that you do, yeah, Then you're working in harmony. Right, You're working in a, in a way that's good, brings that synergy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the next section of this book is all common sense, Like we'll read through these next 12 things here very quickly, because I can't imagine you wouldn't want these kinds of people around you. Would you not want people who think of others before themselves, or think better than themselves, or have passion that's contagious, or have complimentary gifts? Or people who connect and provide great support to other people or have a can-do, creative spirit when they're challenged, or expand your influence or their influence, or that are activists who are ladder builders, not ladder climbers, people who are head and shoulders above the crowd. Ladder climbers, people who are head and shoulders above the crowd provide synergies that give a high return or make a difference in us. Now, that was a quick list, so again want to encourage you get this book, read this chapter, live it out loud for yourself, investigate. Are you those 12 things for others and for yourself? Because there's not a single one of those 12 that I can think of that I would say I don't really want to be aligned with the person that does that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly, and I think that if you're finding all of those things in people it goes to what he says a little bit after that where it's strong partnership divides the effort and multiplies the effect, right. So if you've got those 12 things, you've got a group of people who bring all this together. You know we're like-minded in where we're headed but we're like valued in these 12 areas, then the effort is less but the return is way more right. If that multiplication effect that you know we really do strive to get to when we're bringing teams together, and you know we really do strive to get to when we're bringing teams together and you know bringing people together, and I just think that that's I don't know. I like the idea of finding the values that then lead to like less work, more return on investment. I think that that's, you know, that's great.
Speaker 1:And then there was a quote a few pages later that I loved. It was from an author and speaker, brian Tracy, and I started this one because I thought like I read it and I thought about it, and I read it and I thought about it. But you are a living magnet. You are invariably attracting to your life people and situations in harmony with your dominant thoughts, with your dominant thoughts. And I thought of you and I think, like, the reason I thought about this is because I thought about you and you know how how much emphasis you put on the thoughts that we have and how that leads to really everything. Right, and it's kind of this cycle that that happens. But I just, like you, are invariably attracting people and situations in harmony with your dominant thoughts, and I just thought that was such an interesting thought process.
Speaker 1:Right, my dominant thoughts are probably a lot are most likely aligned to my dominant values. Right, and if they're not right, I can kind of feel that something's incongruent in my life. But if I'm thinking about what are the? It made me think about what are the dominant thoughts in my life? And you know, I think that's a really good question. I think that's a really good question. Are those bringing like right? Are those the thoughts? Are those the people I want? Are those the situations I want being brought into my life? And I don't know. I really I thought of you when I read that and reread it and reread it, and reread it.
Speaker 2:I love that. That's a quote that makes you think of me. So we're going to close here with something that each of us could do. It's a reflective exercise. It's best to do if you have this book and it's even better if you do it with a coach. If you don't have a coach and you're looking for a coach or want to explore what coaching can do for you, message us. Scott has multiple ways for you to reach us in the show notes.
Speaker 2:But here's the exercise write down what your values are, because remember, it starts with self. Self-centeredness is not selfish. This is a good self-centered exercise because you're centering in on who you are and what are your values. The second thing he recommends in the book is who shares your values, who are the people that you know that have those same types of values. And then, lastly and most importantly and where you can make a real difference in your own intentional living, is that you find a place to partner with those people today. Like he doesn't say partner with them eventually, partner with them sometime, he says find a place to partner with them today. That's how you achieve a life that matters, life that matters, and so it's a really great segue for us to talk about what will we share next time in the almost last episode of the book Sam? So how do we take this all to achieve a life that matters?
Speaker 1:Right, so we have taken this from. I want to make a difference, doing something that makes a difference, with people who make a difference at a time that makes a difference. So in the next episode, we'll talk about living with a sense of anticipation and being urgent, about seizing significant opportunities, right, so this is about you know. You know what you want to do, you know you know what, how you're going to do that, who you're doing it with. And this is when are you doing it right, when are those opportunities, when are those things that are happening and how do you seize those moments? And this I'm excited to talk next episode, because there were some interesting thoughts that popped up as we talked about anticipation especially.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm looking forward to it as well, so I will anticipate being with you next time. Friends, remember, these episodes are going to finish before the end of the year. So, in order for you to get the right episode at the right time and the right place, subscribe to our podcast and share it with others. If you subscribe, you get an automatic notice that the podcast is headed your way, and we do hope that you'll share this with others, just as we've taught today that making a difference in life is so much better and so much more rewarding when you do it with other people. So, for today, my name is Denise Russo and, on behalf of my favorite person, I get to do this with every episode. Sam Powell, this has been another episode of what's on your Bookshelf.