What's on Your Bookshelf?
“What’s On Your Bookshelf” is a personal and professional growth podcast exploring the intersections of passion, potential, and purpose - featuring multi-certified coach and leadership development consultant Denise R. Russo alongside Andy Hughes, Scott Miller, and Samantha Powell.
What's on Your Bookshelf?
101 - Five Bold Choices: Rise above Your Circumstances and Redefine Your Life - Introduction
What if the choices you make today could transform your tomorrow? "The Five Bold Choices" by Jay Coughlin and Larry Julian, a book that challenges us to rise above life's circumstances and redefine our paths. As we weave through the practical advice and personal anecdotes shared by these compelling authors, we discover how strategic decisions can lead to untapped potential and impactful change. From Denise's resilience in the face of a devastating flood to Jay's journey of finding purpose after a life-altering car accident, we share stories that exemplify the power of bold choices in overcoming obstacles.
Throughout our discussion, we reflect on the importance of clarity, support systems, and realistic planning, drawing connections with principles from "Fierce Conversations" and "Atomic Habits." We emphasize how gradual choices culminate in significant outcomes, much like a picture hanging securely until the pressure causes it to fall. This episode is a call to action for self-reflection and growth, inviting listeners to engage with introspective questions that align with what truly matters. Whether you're seeking personal or professional transformation, this conversation offers a roadmap for breaking boundaries and stepping boldly into a resilient future.
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Welcome to what's on your Bookshelf, with your hosts Denise Russo and Samantha Powell.
Speaker 2:Hi everyone, welcome back to another episode of what's on your Bookshelf life and leadership podcast, where we are living out loud the pages of the books on our bookshelves. My name is Denise Russo, I'm here with my co-host, sam Powell, and before we get into the book that we're kicking off today, I just have to say, sam, how exciting it was last week for us to preclude what today is all about.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely, and this is officially our 100th episode, so very exciting. So we'm very excited to kick this off and to talk about the five bold choices today. And today we're going to be going through the introductory chapter section of this book and, yeah, this is a. I think this is gonna be an interesting book for people.
Speaker 2:Absolutely so. If you missed our very first episode of the year, that was on January 1. So go back and listen to that episode. It's a super short one, but it's where we announce all of the books for 2025 that we'll be going through. There's only four of them, and that will give you an opportunity to get those books if you'd like to take your own deep dives into these books with us together.
Speaker 2:This book that we're going to share, kicking off today the Five Bold Choices. It's by these two guys, jay Coughlin and Larry Julian. What I love about this book is it's about rising above your circumstances and redefining your life. So we talked about last year how to navigate happiness despite circumstances. The year before that, we talked about how to build healthy habits and good leadership values in your life. This book is a really nice, short, well-laid out book that will help us, together, walk through things that they call five bold choices, and we're going to start today with just simply the intro. So I'm curious, sam, for you, as we picked this book up as our very first one for the year. What do you think you could share with the listeners about why this one comes first?
Speaker 1:Yeah. So our theme for the year is breaking boundaries right, taking bold moves for a resilient life. So I think that that's. This is the five bold choices. So these are what they call. You know, a guidebook for anyone who feels stuck and wants to get back into the path. And they in the book. In this introduction, they say that the five bold choices about helping you find or reclaim the real life you've been called to lead by, helping you break through the barriers that prevent you from realizing your untapped potential. And so to break through these barriers and for us, we're breaking boundaries this year these are the five bold things that they think you need to do every day to really push past that. So this is, I think, starting the year out very purposefully, in a simple but bold, action-oriented way of you know, of living your life, of doing things and of thinking about. You know, thinking about things.
Speaker 1:And this book's interesting because it's two authors and it's not two authors that have some blended voice throughout the book. They it's. It's like one chapter is, or like one sub chapter is one of them talking, the other one is the other one talking. So it's an interesting book because you're really getting two different voices. You know who's talking to you when you're doing it. It's two different stories and two different perspectives. So it's a really interesting I don't know. It's a very easy read because it's broken down into like little bits and pieces that you can, you know, read it for five minutes, put it down. Read it for five minutes, put it down. So this is a great one if you have, like, a very busy life and you want to read through. But this one's, you know, very approachable in that space, which I think is also really nice as you kick off the year and you're busy with everything you're trying to get started in 2025 here.
Speaker 2:I like how you painted the picture, because I think that's what we also do on our show together. We're reading these books at the same time with one another, but the way we share, how we're living it out loud, is different at your house than it is from my house. We don't even live in the same state, and so I think it's a really good description for how these two people could still be looking at the same topic. Now we are two people looking at the same topic and sharing it with all of you that are going to be looking at the same topic as well. When I picked up this book it's not a new book, it came out in 2016.
Speaker 2:And I was actually told about this book because someone was sharing with me about how they saw that I was a person that seemed to rise above obstacles, and my outlook on life is that there's always an opportunity, and there had been a really significant obstacle in my life in 2009, where my home and neighborhood were destroyed in a very terrible flood, and and so I often have shared with people about how I navigated that experience, and we all have our own experiences that feel like an overwhelming flood to our own lives.
Speaker 2:It could be a loss of a job, or a loss of a loved one, or loss of a relationship, or maybe just something went sideways in our career, and so this book is really about some solid ideas to not just make your job better, but it's really about looking at your life and your leadership, which we say is about the principle of what's on your bookshelf.
Speaker 2:It's a life and leadership podcast where we live out loud the pages of the books that are on our shelf, and this is to help your personal and your professional life just get elevated from where it is today to where maybe you want it to be tomorrow, and so I love how this chapter in the intro started out by saying that the authors together believe that overcoming difficulties and failures through the lens of an opportunity are the stepping stones to a life of significance, instead of obstacles to be avoided. We both are John Maxwell certified coaches and trainers, and one of the things that John teaches is that you no longer really can appreciate just success, whatever you determine success is in business or in life once you've tasted a life of significance. And so this is about living a life of significance, not just success and not just failure. And yet he starts out the book by saying there are some times in life when we just feel stuck yeah yeah, and I, and I think that that's really what this year's about for us.
Speaker 1:Right, as we, we set the stage last year of what does it take to get into happiness and live a life that is fulfilling, and live a life that is intentional, and live a life that is intentional and live a life that really does bring you joy. But the reality is, life happens, right, there's pain and failure and shame and negative self-talk and things that happen, and so this is the beginning of how do you move past that, how do you overcome and how do you appreciate the journey and find happiness in the journey, despite the challenges that come your way and despite everything, and the argument that they make is to do that, you've got to, every day, make these five bold choices that we'll dive deep into. So this is the intro of all of that, but, um, the episodes that will follow will all be a choice at a time, um, one of one of the five, and, uh, we'll deep dive in into those spaces. But, um, I like how this is. This is laid out, um, because, like I said, it's two authors. So Jay really comes in and talks about how to get from point A to point B. He introduces the five bold choices, like he kind of gives you the practical piece of it and then Larry comes in and talks about like supplemental thoughts and commentary on like a wide range of leaders and their thoughts and things like that. So it's really interesting to get this multiple perspective and, like you said, it kind of feels like what you know, what we do and what we, you know, what we're trying to accomplish here. So it's an interesting layout.
Speaker 1:But you know, this introduction starts out with a story of Jay's where you know this reminded me of like the Mo Goddard story like this kind of begins in tragedy. And Jay's story sort of begins in in tragedy where he and his father were out and about and spent a day hunting, having a good time, went to the bar, had some, had too much to drink, jay drove home and they got in an accident and his father was killed. He was hospitalized with severe injuries and so when he woke up in the hospital he had to now live with this reconciliation that you know he, he was driving under the influence and his father, you know, died and he had to right. There's consequences for that from like a legal standpoint, from, you know, a state standpoint. But this is really his journey on the other side of that, of how do you, how you move forward despite obstacles.
Speaker 1:So to me there was like a little bit of call back to the Mo Gaudet of like we're starting out very tragically and this is about how you reclaim in Mo's. You know, in the solve for happy with Mogadad, it was how do you reclaim happiness, how do you get to this place where you can re find happiness all the time? And here it's how do you reclaim a life that is purposeful and is meaningful? And you know, I think we all go through that right, we have these. You know, you've got your flood story, I've lost my son there's.
Speaker 1:You know, lots of things in all of our lives that feel like these. You know, how do you move past it? Moments, and there's this kind of idea of reclaiming, of making the choice to move forward, of doing the things you know that you needed to do in order to thrive. On the other side of it and you know he said here there were defining moments that required a bold choice that helped me endure the worst times and find my true potential in the process. And I think that that's really what this book is about? Is you clinging to those moments that are choices?
Speaker 2:is to I sit here and wallow in the thing that happened, or do I make the choice to take the next step, to move forward, mm hmm, I recently have been going through a certification for a program called Fierce Conversations and in one part of this program the presentation or the book was written in 1926, but relevant even today. And so there is this scene in the book where it's these two guys, their expatriates, are sitting in a bar out of the country, from wherever it is, they both live, and the bar is lively and the conversation is just a normal kind of bar conversation. But at one point the conversation turns and one guy looks over to his friend that he's met along his journey and he just sort of pauses and he says to this guy how did you go bankrupt? So you can imagine like wow, where did that come from? In this lively conversation it suddenly turns and this other guy, this guy named Mike, he turns to his friend and he says you know what? I went bankrupt gradually, but then suddenly. And so the idea is that our life is lived through a lot of choices gradually, and so when something happens, like the car accident in this book, that seemed sudden, it was a series of choices that were made that led up to that car accident happening, and maybe for you listening on this episode, you didn't have something that tragic or like the stories that we've shared. It could be something as simple, as you're just in a dead end job where you have security because you get paid on Friday, but you're no longer fulfilled and happy and growing, and maybe you can't wait for Friday and you dread Monday.
Speaker 2:But what this book lays out is three principles. Number one is that sometimes the difficulties and the failures that you avoid and fight are the very portals to your success and significance in life, and so sometimes you have to confront all of those choices so that, instead of having what you've always had, you can have something you've always wanted. There has to be a change, there has to be a shift into something different if you want something different in your life. Number two is that you really can't overcome life's challenges on your own, and if you have a realistic plan, a process and a support system, you can get there. I know this is big for you, sam, because you're a big process person, and that's what we walked through, especially in Atomic Habits, which was having a plan and a process to follow. Even when we looked at all of the books through the happiness series last year, they were about having a system and a process and some tools, and the best way to do it is also through having an engagement with a certified and qualified business coach that can guide you along the way.
Speaker 2:Number three is that everyone's story matters, so you're going to hear about the story of these two authors. Our entire podcast is Sam and I telling stories about how we're living these pages out loud, but everyone's story matters, and so your story of perseverance or overcoming will hopefully help you to not only realize your potential and we talk a lot about this potential, passion and purpose but that you'll inspire, maybe even others to leave a lasting impact to those that you have around you. I know that when we started this podcast, we really weren't doing it to impact listeners. We were doing it for our own self-awareness, our own personal growth, our own development. But what we have found, especially as we celebrate today with 100 episodes, is that there have been thousands of people listening to these episodes for 100 times in a row. So we hope that this book will also continue to add value to you as we share these stories.
Speaker 2:And so there's some. There's some critical areas that we're going to explore, because if you don't have something that makes you uncomfortable, it's easier to just stay where you are? Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1:And I love that you know, as there's a quote in this book where he says life's challenges demand your response and that response defines your character and determines your destiny. Difficulty is an essential part of our story. It calls us to overcome, persevere part of our story. It calls us to overcome, persevere and share our story to inspire others. And I think that that's it reminds me of like a meme I see floating around the internet all the time. I don't know if it's a meme, but like a quote that floats around, that's, you know, like tell the story of how you climbed the mountain because it will become someone else's guidebook. And I think that that's that's really like. No one gets through this life without facing challenging times and challenging moments, and sometimes those are very large and sometimes those are just a lot of little little things. Right, overcoming you know things from your past, overcoming you know these little moments, but that you know, like they say here in this quote, like it demands a response. You have to do something and what you choose to do because this book's about choices that you make really determines your character and it says it determines your destiny, which also reminds me of Atomic Habits, where you know that you should be far more concerned with your trajectory than your current location. Right, you should be far more concerned with how the choices you're making today affect the destiny that you know will come after that, the path that it puts you on, the trajectory that you, that you now live on. And then they kind of move right on to say and I love it.
Speaker 1:I highlighted this little part in it. It's like we all reach turning points that define the direction of our lives, some big, but mostly small. And if you really think about that, right, it's those. That's what we learned in Atomic Habits is it's these little changes, these little things that you do consistently, that really make a big difference. Right, like, here we are at episode 100.
Speaker 1:And this was just just recording one episode at a time, over and over again, having just this little bit of consistency. Right Like meeting every week, recording some episodes, doing all this, like we got to this point. Point, like I had a baby in this time too, like I mean we've done all of this through just these little moments, the choice to continue to meet, the choice to continue to push through, and here we are 100 episodes in, like that's a huge accomplishment, that's a great. You know that's a great thing, but it's I love that they say that like there are some big turning points, but most of them are small, and I think that that's what we found as we explored happiness it's the little things that you do all the time, the little things that you do every day that make the big difference. So, while we're talking about bold choices, it's bold choices in little moments, I think choices.
Speaker 2:It's bold choices in little moments. I think I agree with you and I would like to add that one of the things I appreciate that the author shares is that this is not just a manual that says, okay, go do this. Part of the bold choice and we talk about this in the theme of our entire year is about bold resilience and bold choices that lead to a resilient life. We introduced that on January 1. So again, if you missed that episode, I encourage you to go back and listen to it. But here's the thing is, the authors say that to rise above your difficulty and to get back on track, it requires not just action, but courageous action, or let's call it bold action, because bold choices aren't just about the doing.
Speaker 2:In the way the authors describe this I put stars and underlined and highlighted the whole thing. It says it requires wisdom, patience, determination and perseverance. So this starts, as we often talk about, first, in your thoughts, the wisdom part, in the belief system that you have about the things that you're thinking. Sometimes those beliefs take patience and determination, but those thoughts and beliefs are what turn into our actions. And you could take one action, but if you don't have an atomic habit, you're not going to persevere through the actions, you just won't. Here we are. In January you may have made a resolution that you want to lose weight, get in shape all the things that everybody says in January. You know, research says most people quit them before February. So this is going to take perseverance and while this type of action is not easy, it's what's going to change your life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I love that. He really defines that courageous action as everyday moral courage of choosing the harder right path over the easier wrong one, through small acts of bravery and persistence each day, right, right, and I think that that's what we learned in atomic habits. We saw that in gretchen rubin's the happiness project. Right like she, she did a year's worth of resolutions. Like, here we are in january if you are looking for a guidebook on how to do resolutions through a whole year, like go go back and check out the happiness project, because she's got, she's got it laid out for you and ways to do resolutions through a whole year. Like, oh, go back and check out the happiness project because she's got, she's got it laid out for you on ways to do that. But it's this everyday choice, it's these everyday little things that you decide, and it's these little acts of bravery, these little acts of perseverance, like you know, persistence and perseverance that really get us to this bold life that we are meant to live.
Speaker 2:At the end of this section, which I love throughout the entire book. Again, these books are meant to be lived out loud, which means remember in coach Wooden series he said drink deeply from good books. In fact I recall on the pre callcall that you and I were having, sam, we were talking about how the very early episodes that we did with this podcast they were just sort of like advertisements of other people's books. It wasn't until we took the deep dive, the way Coach Wooden taught, that we were able to really chew on this material, digest it, live it out loud. And so I'm curious for you when you think about what we see in the discussion guide was there for you a defining moment in your past that changed something about the trajectory of your life?
Speaker 1:There's a lot of those. I think, like I can, I can pick out a whole bunch of them that really adjust, and I think that that's the interesting thing, right, it's like something happened and I made this choice that put me in a whole different path than the other right. Like so, one that stands out to me is, um, where I ended up choosing to go for college. So, like I, when I first started high school, I was at a really big high school you know where it's hundreds and hundreds of kids in a graduating class and all that sort of stuff. And then, in between my freshman, my sophomore year, we moved, and when we moved, I went to a very small high school, less than 100 kids in a graduating class. Right, so it was a huge change.
Speaker 1:But through that experience, I realized that the environment that I enjoy being in more than anything else is a smaller, more intimate environment. Right, I like building relationships with all of the people around me. I like being a big fish in a little sea rather than a little fish in a big sea, and some people feel the exact opposite, right, and want the opportunities of, you know, huge environments and things like that. But I learned through this experience that like didn't expect to learn this, that I liked the different things. So when it came time three years later to choose where I was going to go to school to continue my education, I specifically targeted smaller places. I knew I didn't want to go somewhere really big. That wasn't the environment that I felt at that time in my life that I really thrived in because of you know all the things that I learned through these various experiences and so, like that I think is one example. I think a lot of people have stories like that. And then I've had things that have just completely redefined how I view the world and you know huge events that you know kind of changed.
Speaker 1:But when I think about some of these things like, aren't that I don't know, it's just like you, you come across some new experience in life and it changes your perspective to say, oh, what I want now is something different. I deal with this with clients all the time. They get halfway through their career because I work with mid-career professionals. They get halfway through their career and realize this is not what I want, right, the trajectory I'm on is not the one that I'm looking for. So when I think about, like that question that you asked that's what I think about is not the one that I'm looking for.
Speaker 1:So when I think about like that question that you asked that's that's what I think about is we get to these moments in life, we get to these little experiences that add up, that make us realize where we're headed is maybe just different than we thought it was going to be originally. Oh, I always thought I would be or do or whatever, and then I realized one day, after a series of lots of little things happening, or maybe something big happening, that that's, that's actually not what I want and that's okay and that's that takes that takes courage and bravery and boldness to accept that change in yourself and then to go after it no-transcript.
Speaker 2:Thinking back quickly on them, it was that I was stuck and I wanted to be unstuck, and I had a mentor once say stuck stinks, and it sure does. It actually makes me think about something that maybe will give you an analogy that will be relevant to whatever your situation is where you're stuck. So I was hanging up a picture Well, actually I wasn't hanging it up, I was rehanging it up. And I'll tell you. What happened was I had this picture on the wall and it was held up by. You know those like command strips that you can put and then to get them off, it's like's really hard to get them off and rips the paint off the wall. So, uh, they say they don't rip the paint off the wall. That they do unless you're just not taking the tape off the right way, which clearly I wasn't. But what happened was I was sitting peacefully doing something in the house maybe I was reading the book or I'm not sure what I was doing but all of a sudden I heard this loud crash in my house and I thought what in the house? Maybe I was reading a book or I'm not sure what I was doing, but all of a sudden I heard this loud crash in my house and I thought what in the world? What has crashed? So think about this.
Speaker 2:For months, for months, this picture was hanging on my wall and it was fine.
Speaker 2:It was there, it had these strips that are supposed to keep things up on the wall and for a long time it was stable and for a long time nothing changed.
Speaker 2:But remember the story I was telling earlier about gradually, and then suddenly it must have been that gradually the way maybe the air conditioner was blowing down, or maybe just the heaviness and the weight or the burden of this painting on that little tape strip was weighing it down and over time just like how, when water can go over a rock or something like that, that things change in life it just had enough.
Speaker 2:It was like the camel's back broke and the thing crashed and it seemed like it happened suddenly, but it was that it really happened over this time. And so I just want to challenge you as we go through this book because we're almost done for today that you may not realize that the reason that you're stuck is something that has happened for a long time, and you're going to have to make a bold choice, and the very first bold choice that we're going to talk about next week is about clarity and making sure that the important things are really the most important things to you and how we approach that. So, sam, anything else to tie us up for today?
Speaker 1:I love that this book, each, like chapter or section, ends with a discussion guide. But what it is is like five questions for yourself to really think about, which I love because I do a weekly newsletter and in that I do a coaching corner which always has five questions in it for you to think about. You know, just kind of get outside of yourself. So I, if you don't have the book, get the book, because this is a great one to think through and write notes in and all that sort of good stuff. But I, I would like to leave everybody with the last question of this discussion guide, which is what bold choice can you make to move yourself closer to your better tomorrow? So what could you, what choice could you make today that moves you to your better tomorrow? And I think that is such an interesting thing, and especially as we move to clarity next week, and I think that is such an interesting thing, and especially as we move to clarity next week. That's I mean, that's where I start all coaching engagements.
Speaker 1:That's where I start all conversations. When somebody asks for advice or help or whatever is, let's get clear on what's important to you. What do you want? What does that look like? And I'm excited to explore that next week with you.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, Friends. If this is adding value to you, please consider subscribing. We found out from Scott, our producer, that if you are subscribing but you miss an episode or two along the way, you may not be getting the alert of the episode. So I'd encourage you to just go back in and make sure that you're subscribed episode. So I'd encourage you to just go back in and make sure that you're subscribed. If you have a friend or a colleague or someone you care about that can get value from this, please share our episodes with them, and we also would love to hear from you. There's so many of you who have communicated with us over our time together, and so hearing how you are living these things out loud is just as important to us.
Speaker 1:Sam happy 100th anniversary today.
Speaker 2:I can't wait yeah, I can't wait to dive into more next week. So, friends, for today my name is Denise Russo and, on behalf of my friend, sam Powell, thanks for being with us for our 100th episode of what's On your Bookshelf.